Randomness- LONG POST--Beware

This week was Pack Meeting so I was exceptionally busy! I would love to learn to delegate some of this work to other people, but unfortunately, there have been no leaders meetings and everyone else is OK with that. I'm exhausted! I also think I need to ask someone to be our Pack Photographer so I can get pictures of Nate receiving awards. It's really not fair that I have this cute Cub Scout scrapbooking paper but I can't use it for 2 reasons. Number one- I'm too much of a perfectionist for Scrapbooking. Yeah, I'm not good at crafts- at all- really, just ask my Young Women's Leaders. That ADHD diagnosis is making more and more sense as I think about my childhood. I can't believe my parents survived!! Thanks for not giving me back Dad!
My second reason for not using this wonderful Cub Scout scrapbooking paper is- I HAVE NO PICTURES! Sadly, I can't remember to take pictures. Of course, that wouldn't have anything to do with the fact that I'm up in front running the show, now would it?! Ugh. When Nate got his Webelos Badge (after only being in Webelos 3 months I must tell you), we had an awesome ceremony where we painted his face up and he looked like an Indian Warrior. My sister Stefanie and her husband Will came and played some drums to sound like the Indian drum beat. It was awesome but I have no pictures of it. I will have to paint Nathan's face up again soon and take a picture. My camera isn't that great so I guess that's a bonus reason for not having pictures. Heather or Tristen, feel free to come take pictures of my kids anytime!!! I appreciate your talent. I'm not jealous, just wish you lived closer so you could help me out with my lack of pictures problem.

Speaking of pictures, I STILL haven't printed our pictures we had taken in NOVEMBER of last year. Holy Cow...I'm to distracted, overwhelmed, tired, all of the above.

Speaking of tired (you are getting this as it comes out of my brain from here on out..random thoughts included) Marshall has been having trouble sleeping still. He's angry a lot too but he's trying to change his angry face (sometimes). He is easily frustrated and has been flapping his hands A LOT more. He doesn't like eating at all. He's been going to feeding therapy with a Speech Language Pathologist for I don't know how long. Several months at least. I forgot and I can't remember when we started so I give up trying. He used to have feeding therapy with his Occupational Therapist but she was not having luck with Mr. Inconsistent so she referred us to Courtney, an awesome SLP who specializes in behavior feeding therapy. Ya know what? We've figured out lots of interesting things since she started. She said he has Dysphagia, a significant fine motor delay, oral motor delay, and Hypotonia in his jaw. That's a fancy way of saying his jaw muscles are weak and get tired easily. He hasn't picked if he's going to be left or right handed yet and this only causes problems because he never strengthens either hand. He just switches off. I'm a bit (make that VERY) overwhelmed by all I have going on. I babysit 3 extra kids 3 days a week and somewhere in the chaos, I have to find time to practice Marshall's chewing. He likes to lick us a lot and I don't particularly care for it, thank-you very much! He also licks windows, tables, himself, other people, pretty much anything. He likes to kiss all over my arm too. I'm grateful that he's affectionate, really I am, but I don't really think he needs to kiss that much. He tried licking our Home Teacher tonight but luckily, he didn't succeed. So instead, he licked his hands and rubbed his head with them. Yummy. He jumps a lot still. I mean, A LOT A LOT. Our poor neighbors downstairs put up with a lot from this family. They are so kind. I did put up our outside trampoline so he can jump on that more. He is very happy about that and spent several HOURS on the trampoline on Friday. Woohoo! And no, it didn't help him sleep better, but thanks for asking. I get told that a lot. When we've been at a Ward party and he's been running around everywhere, people will say, "Oh, he'll sleep good tonight." I just smile and say, "I doubt it." I'm not mean, I'm just real. They don't get it. They are nice though and very loving and I love my ward but nobody really can understand unless they have a child like him. People try though and that's what counts, right?

Ok, my brain just started thinking about how much I like this music I'm listening to on Pandora Radio. It's a beautiful piano arrangement of Keep the Commandments, a song I learned as a child. Speaking of keeping the commandments, (see, there is order to my chaotic brain. I stick to topics, I just get on a different topic easily) we've been commanded to "Remember the Sabbath Day to keep it holy." We've been trying harder the last few weeks to do this better. Monday night, Brian gave the Family Home Evening lesson from The Children's Friend titled, Sunday Stations. Today we did our Sunday Stations, which were things for the kids to do so that we kept the Sabbath Day holy. To start, we set the timer for 10 minutes and had Brian help Nate work on his Faith in God Requirements. Did I tell you he earned his Religious Knot for Cub Scouts? Nate is awesome!! There haven't been many boys who earned it. Not because it's hard but because it takes parents and kids working together to succeed. So does Cub Scouts and he is doing awesome there too. Most boys don't get their Webelos Badge until they are almost out of Webelos. In the LDS church, Webelos is a 1 year program but in Non-LDS Packs, boys are in it for 2 yrs. So, Nate has already done more than most kids his age. Way to go buddy boy! Oh yeah, Sunday Stations. While Nate worked on Faith in God, I called my Dad and had Marshall talk to him until the timer went off. He talked to him (well, kind of) for 10 minutes. WOW!!! That's inredible! Sure, he told him about things that make no senese but they make sense to Marshall and I knew what he was talking about so it's OK. Then we switched and Nate talked to Papa (they call my Dad Papa) while Marshall and I attempted to color. I say attempted because it turns into a tiny bit of scribbling and then he's done. Remember that fine motor delay? Yeah, I read something that said by 18 mo. they should be holding a pencil with a fist, with the thumb up. Marshall STILL holds it that way and he's almost 4 1/2. Did you know at age 3 1/2 he should be able to dress himself? No way!!! We're still having a HUGE battle with getting him to even TRY to get himself dressed. I'm getting worn out. I'm tired of battles. I'm tired of having to tell him that he CAN get dressed, he just needs to try. He only has a few pairs of jeans and he's so skinny that he can pull them on without having to unbutton or unzip them. He still needs me to wipe his bottom too. I don't know how he can go to pre-school if he can't wipe himself. Well, he goes to pre-school now but it's Special Ed preschool. Today he told me there is a boy there who wears diapers. He just came in the kitchen while I was finishing up dinner and out of the blue said, "Talin wears diapers." I had no idea what he was talking about but I finally figured out that Talin is a boy at school. Who knew?! His brain seems to work as randomly as mine does.

I want sleep. Really. A full night would be good. Marshall has to take Clonidine and Melatonin to even attempt to get him to go to sleep and it never helps him stay alseep all night. Oh, I didn't write that we tried using a stimulant on him (under doctor's orders) to get him to calm down a bit. BAD PLAN!!!! He was OK until night time. The first night on it, he woke up every 2 hrs all night long. Ugh. TIRED Mommy! The next night, I put out his meds (oh yeah, he also has Refulx pretty bad) and had to run to the bathroom. He and Nate were standing there together and Marshall was TELLING Nate that those were HIS PILLS!!! I figured since he was being so adamant about them, that he took them. If he didn't, I knew that Nate, AKA Wannabeincharge, would tell me. He didn't. Meaning, Marshall didn't take the pills and Nate didn't tell us. I forgot all about it and went about the rest of my stressful, tired evening, making sure to give Marshall a bath with the Lavendar body wash (does that stuff really work? I don't think so. It's not worth the money!). I read him books and got him bed but he just wouldn't/ couldn't go to sleep. I kept going in his room and telling him be quiet and please go to sleep. He wouldn't stop talking. He kept Nate up until past 10pm. Finally, I brought him in my bed and put on Baby Mozart because he was still very wide awake (I was not). He kept nudging me and talking to me and waking me up. I was so tired and gettimg more frustrated so I finally asked Brian to help. Brian went to the kitchen to get some water and saw Marshall's pills on the counter. DUH!! Rule #1- NEVER let a 4 yr old be in charge of his own medication!! Thank-you ADHD in my brain. Brian gave him the meds around 10:30 but by 11:30, he STILL wasn't calming down. Finally, Brian sent me to the couch and he laid down with Marshall. After saying a quick prayer, Brian put his hand on Marshall's chest and Marshall put his hand on Daddy's. Brian said Marshall's heart was just going a mile a minute and he was still so fidgety. Brian was able to calm him down and get him to sleep but he was, of course, tired the next day. He does pretty well for how sleep deprived he is. He's pretty darn good I think.

Oh my goodness. That's enough randomness for one night. Who even reads this stuff? It's too long. I haven't even touched the tip of the iceberg with what's been going on in our family. Marshall has been more out of control, we've been tired still, and Nate is doing wonderfully in anything he wants to set his mind to doing. Oh, and a lady in the ward wants to teach the kids piano but we can't afford it so she said she would teach them for free if I do at least 1 hr of gardening for her each week. I said no thank-you. I want the boys to learn piano but I'm completely overwhelmed with what I have going on now and I just don't think I can add anything else. My talented kids will just have to learn from me or not at all.